I sometimes wonder about the cost of constant supervision to a child’s development. It seems that the new social expectation is to either hawk over our children, assessing every risk while sheltering them from all potential harm – whether real or imagined. Or put a remote in their hands and have the TV keep them entertained – so long as they’re physically safe from the apparent dangers of the outside world.
We’ve all heard about the Maryland parents that were charged with child neglect after allowing their two free range kids to walk home from the park unsupervised. If these concerned people had seen the way I grew up, they’d be appalled. We had little to no supervision and, in the time before video games, found entertainment wherever we could. Our teeter totter, for example, was a forty foot grain auger that, when balanced out, would send a kid 20 feet off the ground. The kid on the bottom only hopped off once sending the other crashing to the ground with a loud metallic clank of farm equipment. Lesson leaned. By the time I was 8 or 9 I was hacking my way through the Florida swamps with a machete searching for cottonmouths. If you pin their bodies with a stick close behind the head you can grab them without much risk. My cousins and I made big sport out of this.
We watched Saturday morning cartoons but as soon as breakfast was done we were kicked out with strict instructions not to return until dinner. If my mother’s threats didn’t carry enough weight, my dad had a wonderful way of ensuring compliance. If I did have the misfortune of being discovered watching TV in the middle of a nice summer day, he’d promptly find something more productive for me to do. Pulling nails from old lumber, picking up sticks, cleaning horse stalls… the opportunities were endless. In addition to learning to stay out or the house, I learned quickly to never claim boredom – an action that would elicit the “well then, let’s find something for you to do” response from pops. As a result I found plenty of things to keep busy, mostly in the river bottoms and swamps surrounding our place. And there, I learned many of the skills I still use today.
I didn’t realize, and certainly didn’t appreciate it at the time, but I was super fortunate. Growing up with that kind of freedom and autonomy instills a kind of personal responsibility and accountability that seems rare today. You have experiences, learn to solve problems, rely on yourself, cooperate with friends, you make mistakes and you learn from them. As the example from Maryland shows, there is a lot of attention paid to keeping kids physically safe but I can’t help to think this comes at a great cost. Scratches, bruises, and burned fingers are a great teacher.
My two boys are learning the same things I did, albeit on the other side of the continent from where I grew up. At 5 and 7 years, they spend hours in the woods behind our place completely unsupervised and free to build, catch, or wrangle whatever they want, living the life of free range kids. Aside from having to retrieve a tool or two on occasion that’s gone missing from my shop, it’s worked out pretty well. They’re learning to cooperate on projects, inventing traps and building forts. But most importantly, they’re learning that they can do things themselves, so long as they try, and that they’re responsible for their own actions. Two things that seem in short supply today.
I and my brother and cousins grew up in the 50’s and 60’s. We were in the woods and creek bottoms building forts, looking for critters, and skinny dipping. The worst that happened was a couple of cases of chiggers. We entertained ourselves and survived.
Brings back great memories Clay! Whether it was building “forts”, finding world berry patches or best of all off to the woods with a gun or bow or down to the creek with fishing pole, (or a bow in the spring) usually accompanied by the dog. It was dog and kid heaven!
Unfortunately my boys didn’t get that opportunity growing up but my oldest is living in my mom’s house at the farm and has completely immersed himself in that and enjoying the hell out of it.
I and my brother and cousins grew up in the 50’s and 60’s. We were in the woods and creek bottoms building forts, looking for critters, and skinny dipping. The worst that happened was a couple of cases of chiggers. We entertained ourselves and survived. My son and grandson was raised the same way. Proud of my early self education.
I absolutely love the video and this article. Kids today either in from of a TV (Idiot Box) with a remote or playing games making them mush brains. Growing up I rarely stayed inside. On weekends and during the summer, I would leave the house in the early AM and head straight for the woods either hunting, trapping or building forts along the branch, creek and river. My mother had one major rule to be home before dark. I only broke that rule one time when me and some other boys went so deep in a new area we got lost for a little while until I said I am following the river line area heading north to get out and it worked. Those were the good ole days that need to come back for every boy and girl to live again. You and your family have a blessed weekend.
Yes, free range kids, I love it ! When I was young I was growing up in East New York Brooklyn, very rough neighborhood, think Good Fella’s the movie. We would be out all day, mostly roaming through the swamps looking for big rat’s to kill with our sling shots, we were really quite deadly with them. As we got a little older, say 10-12 years old we figured out how to make a zip gun out of a car antenna, did you know that a 22cal. Short fit perfectly into the bottom piece of tubing, take a slide bolt door lock file it to a point, fix them both to a piece of wood so that the point of the bolt lock is there same height as the rim of the bullet and voila, you have a pretty accurate zip gun, very effective on rat’s !
We were definitely free range kids, always roaming around seeing what mischief we could get into, never hurt anyone, we were just a bit wild, nobody would mess with us as we were armed to the teeth, never had any problems with child molesters and such, and it’s probably just as good as we would have more than likely dispatched them ! We also played a lot of sports, we had to be dragged into the house for dinner inner under the threat of violence. I know it’s a bit different than you and your children but it does go to show, kids are kids.
Oddly enough I was always drawn to the woods, my whole life I would want to go camping or at least head up to the mountains and do stuff.
My boys are the same way, though they are adults now.
Well done Sir, well done!!
Great article Clay. I really enjoyed it and my childhood fortunately resembled yours, having grown up in the wilds of northern PA. All the best. Bill Baughman
I loved it Clay! Glad to see other parents getting their kids outside! Keep up the good work!
I too grew up on a farm . ran all over the hills of yamhimn county in Oregon ; building forts,chasing animals ; shooting firearms etc.It has instilled everything you mentioned also,I think the work and life ethics that were instilled is imeasureable !!!!! ANd thank God my kids are growing up the same way!!! Famlies like ours at a rarity now,and that is unfortunate for all of us. Keep it up!!!!
I was raised by my grand parents on a small farm on Vancouver island where we were expected to work and help with the “chores”, which is an activity few kids today even know about. We never thought of complaining as it was just the way it was in the fifties. On the other hand, when we were finished our chores for the day, and there was time to play, we were off in the bush doing any number of things, mostly which we kept to ourselves. The only thing I can remember granny saying was “oh dear look how filthy you boys are, what have you been doing?, now you get cleaned up, supper is nearly ready”. I believe she never waited for an answer because she didn’t want to hear it. As long as we were not late – no questions were asked.
Yeah, those “forts” we built were our refuge and our childhood passion.
Of course, there was always “cowboys and Indians” when we made crude wooden guns and willow stick bows and arrows. My first victim with a bow was a squirrel which I proudly took home and was taught how to skin by pappy who was a trapper. Can you imagine the angst of parents today if they even suspected that their children were involved with that kind of entertainment! And not supervised!
Then there was the creek. I can’t imagine a child growing up without a little woods with a creek running through!
They hadn’t even invented plastic yet. Or battery operated toys. Pappy, my paternal grandfather, made wooden toys for us kids, such as little scooters that you had to use your legs to propel along and other hand made creations. He even helped us with our own projects and taught us how to use carpentry tools properly. Another important habit that I still have.
I learned how to use an axe properly at a young age and was given a small hatchet as a gift when I was in grade one. It came with proper instruction from pappy on how to use it and maintain it.
From then on I was expected to keep the kindling box well supplied with cedar kindling. I considered that a fair deal at the time.
Thanks for reminding us of those “good “ol’days when kids could be kids.
Clay, this is pretty much how I grew up too.
Hanging out with my friends in the bush of Western Australia unsupervised, only going back home when it got dark or someone came and found us because we were needed at home.
Loads of caving, bushwalking, catching lizards, snakes, frogs and other creatures… It was an awesome childhood.
It’s just a pity that these days it’s unsafe unless you’re on private property, and that kids can’t get away from their screens for more than a few minutes at a time to learn to enjoy the natural world.
I’d love to go back to my childhood and do it all again…
Thanks for the video, it’s stirred up some awesome memories!
Excellent piece. I spent the same type of childhood in a Massachusetts suburb. Well minus horse stalls and Cottonmouths. The more time children spend outdoors away from technology and “directed play” the more confidence and independence they build.
Great blog and awesome video! Reminds me of the way we spend our time when I was a kid. Too bad things have changed to what it is nowadays. Kids have the right to explore and experience the beauty of the outdoors!
That zip gun sounds pretty cool. I might have to get some more details and make one myself! ch
Great video. I wish I had a better understanding of edible plants when I was younger. We cooked many rabbits and squirrels that fell to arrows and pellet guns when I was growing up, but we didn’t have a well balanced diet in the timber 😀. We also always grabbed a pack of deer steak out of the freezer before we set out just in case. You’re setting a great example for your kids. Keep it up and thanks for the great article and video.
Very nice! only a small gripe as I know others were around watching them. I was concerned about them building a fire without clearing the ground around it first. Other than that excellent
Clay,
Another fine piece. Thanks. I carry the name “Coy” as well, as a middle, handed down from an Irish immigrant great-grandfather – great to see the rather rare name is still finding it’s way. I knew a rural Wyoming childhood much like what you have captured here, but my son is a city dweller. For all the horrible press the cities get, there are positives for the kids and we try to replicate the freedoms were we can. We do a lot of second guessing about downsizing lives and careers to make the move back out West, and may get there one day.
Until then, please keep the videos, blog posts, and conservation activism going. Without the wild and clean public lands, only the privileged few will ever know this kind of autonomy.
A short video like this is probably a lot more important than many people realize. You’re doing a great job raising those boys Clay. More people should take notice. If they did our future would be just fine. Thank you my friend. Barry Wensel
I was born in St Louis, a block away from Hoyt. There was a creek there we tried to trap muskrats in. Shot arrows, 15 cents each from Hoyt,at everything. Then we moved to KY-I was in heaven. In high school,I put my shotgun in my locker so I could hunt doves after school. People on farms we not as protective as now, and I could hunt groundhogs by walking from town out 5 miles, then hitch hike back home. Invent, modify, build-fail, try again-self taught life lessons. Maybe hacking carries the same lessons-NOT. OUTSIDE the house is the most healthy place for kids, sometimes without a structured program. Great observations
Beautiful. I am so lucky that my grandchildren are all given this opportunity to explore and learn just like I provided for my children and my parents before me.
Great article, really enjoyed the video!!
You know there is nothing but truth to it.
I was fortunate to grow up much the same
I always enjoy your posts , thanks! And
Those are lucky Boys!
Clay – the cost of constant supervision of kids and not allowing them to connect with nature is ENORMOUS. It is the cost of their children’s futures and their own. Those of us that are part of industrial society are suffering from severe lack of connection. Wonderful article and especially, video!
Matt
transitionrewild.blogspot.com
Brings back some wonderful memories. Super impressed with how much responsibility these young boys showed with the fire. Great Job… RB
Thanks David, they were in a creek bottom with little to no ground cover. Very moist and totally safe.
My wife and I let our sons run most of the places they wanted to and I am sure they got into the places we would have liked them to stay out of and I am sure they are better off for it. I had a very long leash as a kid too. I usually had skinned up knees and elbows and maybe had to be stitched up a couple times but wouldn’t have it any other way. I can’t think of a better way to foster the fascination with the outdoors.